Blog
Set the Scene for a Top-Scoring Essay with an Essay Introduction
3rd October 2013
The Examiners Report for the June 2013 sitting of AQA BUSS4 makes a very interesting comment.
It suggests that students who write a suitable introduction to each of their two essays can contribute to a better-performing and, therefore, higher-scoring essay.
This makes perfect sense and it follows from something that we emphasis on our exam coaching workshops for BUSS4. Good BUSS4 essays start with a plan. Good essays know what they are trying to argue.
It must be true that an essay which is suitably focused on the essay question has a higher chance of success than a rambling, unfocused answer. Focused essays tend to be those that are well planned and which consist of a small number of well developed, relevant paragraph points.
It follows that a strong essay introduction can't really be written unless the student has planned the essay! How can you introduce something if you don't know what you want to say or where you argument is heading?
The essay plan doesn't have to be a long one - just enough to signpost the paragraph points to be provided, which directly answer the question, and the evidence to be provided in support of the analysis in each point. A good plan also highlights the key evaluative issues that can be addressed at the end of each point and in the final evaluative paragraph which directly answers the essay question.
So, the (3-5 minute) process for your essay plan and getting ready to write a good introduction looks something like this:
(1) Think carefully about which essay question (from the options provided) you are going to answer (choose the best for you)
(2) Double check- are you really sure you know what the essay question is asking? It might look familiar to one you've answered before - but every question is different.
(3) What is your initial response to what your answer is - the question will always ask for your opinion (e.g. "do you think?", "to what extent do you agree?"). This will guide your overall evaluation.
(4) What paragraph points will you make? Choose 3-4 max - each with a clear line of analysis supported by your research examples.
Let's give it a go!
Imagine you decide to choose the following exam-style essay title in the BUSS4 exam on China:
To what extent do you agree that the external business environment in China is unfavourable for Western multinationals looking to invest in China?
Note: this question is about the "external business environment" and whether it is still attractive to large businesses (multinationals) outside of China. So your answer should be about the external business environment and related to the perspective that multinationals have of investing in China. Nothing else matters in your essay.
An effective approach to consider the external business environment is to use the PESTLE framework which looks issues relating to the different parts of the external environment:
- Political
- Economic
- Social
- Technological
- Legal
- Ethical/Environmental
You could also legitimately look at the competitive environment - another crucial external influence on a business and the way in which it assess the relatively favourability of a country like China.
Thinking about the above frameworks, you can see that there are many potential paragraph points that might be developed in response to that essay title. For example:
- The political environment in China appears to have become more hostile towards multinationals as the Chinese authorities have started to focus on market reform (examples: JP Morgan, Danone, GSK, Nestle);
- China's rate of economic growth has slowed somewhat in recent years and may remain relatively low as China aims to rebalance its economy, reducing the reliance on infrastructure investment but trying to increase the proportion of GDP generated by consumption;
- In many of China's markets, multinationals now face intense competition from domestic businesses which have now developed sufficient scale and expertise to compete effectively both in China and abroad (e.g. Huawei, Haier, Gree, Lenovo);
- China continues to go through a process of intensive social and economic change (e.g. the ongoing process of urbanisation, ageing population);
- China's competitive advantage as a source of low-cost labour has been significantly eroded. Average wages have risen strongly in recent years and although labour productivity has also increased, China has fewer attractions to multinationals looking to use investment in China as a source of low-cost supply;
- The urbanisation of the Chinese population together with rapid economic growth has taken hundreds of millions of Chinese people out of extreme poverty and created a substantial "middle class" with higher standards of living;
- The legal framework of doing business in China seems to be in constant change and multinationals can be taken by surprise by sudden changes. However, China is increasingly tackling the issues of corruption which have long made China one of the hardest places in which to do business.
Your essay plan would need to pick no more than 3-4 relevant points.
Having selected the paragraph points you want to develop and identified your overall opinion, you can then get started on the essay with a neat introduction!
It might look like this:
"The external business environment in any country or market is always changing. But, in China the external environment is complex and changing rapidly which makes it difficult for multinationals to assess how favourable it is. In this essay I will argue that, overall, the external business environment is still favourable for multinationals looking to invest in China even though they face increasingly intense local competition, tougher regulation and potentially higher operating costs. The sheer scale of the opportunity created by China's economic transformation, particularly the emerging Chinese middle class, means that China is a market that multinationals cannot afford to ignore even if the external environment might seem to be hostile and unpredictable."
That's it. You're good to go. From the very start of the essay the examiner knows that you have read and understood the question. The examiner can see how you are going to approach answering the question. He/she might even be looking forward to reading what you have to say!